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I've heard that riding tandem takes some skill and practice. The captain is at the controls and handles the bike, while the stoker rides in the second seat. The stoker should be very quiet (little body movement) on the bike.The stoker has to learn how to get his water bottle or look behind him without leaning the bike. This takes time and practice, or you crash and burn.

I am the stoker. I am not in control. It's one of those basic Christianity things, right? Yet, this is part of our personal training that needs renewal with every new situation in life. As I look back on my life, so many conflicts could have been avoided if I just would have been quiet in His control. I have so far to go in this area!

He is the Captain. The One who leads and guides and is responsible for the stoker's comfort (calling bumps, etc.) and safety (they have little control and can't see directly to the front anyway). If the captain doesn't look out for the stoker you're better off on two singles.

I'd rather ride tandem with God than be on my own. My Captain takes care of me! It's one of the beautiful lessons I'm learning in caregiving. While I take care of mom, He takes care of me. One of my greatest joys is that I am learning to watch the Captain's movements, listen to the Captain's wishes and be quiet as I follow. That's my job, to watch Him, while He watches out for me.

I have so many stories I could tell you. There was the time I was so exhausted after the pacemaker insertion that I couldn't even think. (This is NOT exaggeration!)  My brother called and said he'd some stay with mom for a few days and nights. Wow! By the time he left I was ready to go again. My Captain was looking out for me. By the way, that scenario happens over and over with brothers, sister in laws, and friends. When I go for long spurts with no relief, I say, well my Captain will take care of me!

There was the time early on after mom's surgery, we got a long letter from a friend who took care of her mom until God called her home. It was a letter full of extremely helpful advice which I have practiced. (God at the controls, directing!) One thing she said, that frankly, I didn't even notice, (it was a long letter) was that her husband would take the night shift because he could sleep anywhere. Well, Craig saw that part of the letter and informed me that I could enjoy Saturday night with mom, but that all the other evenings he would take the night shift  (because he can sleep anywhere.) We are both amazed as God directs and cares for us!

I really can go on and on. In fact, I did and then deleted it all. This is just to say that as you serve the Lord as a caregiver, you will go through extremely difficult, draining days. No need to look ahead. No need to see the way. No need to look out for yourself. God will. You just need to follow His lead.

OK, one more story. Last week, mom's friend the hairdresser came to do her hair. It's a good time for me to take that hour to do something else, but this particular day my Captain put a check in my heart. I didn't hear a voice, I just felt like I shouldn't leave. Karen said, "Nancy go, do something else for awhile." (A big lesson I'm learning in caregiving is to listen to God, not even my dearest friends,) so I said "You know, I think I'll just hang out today." I don't need to tell you the end. Mom fell that day and I needed to be there.

Even telling you that story makes me love the Lord all the more. He is the best Captain!  I'm learning to ride tandem, to be quiet and let Him direct and control. It's so joyful! I wouldn't miss this trip for anything.

We search the starlit Milky Way,
A million worlds in rhythmic sway,
Yet in our blindness some will say,
“There is no God controlling!”

But as I grope from sphere to sphere,
New wonders crowd the eye, the ear,
And faith grows firmer every year:
“My God is there, controlling!”

We probe the atoms for their cause,
Explore the earth for nature’s laws,
Yet seldom in our searching pause
To think of God controlling.

Each flash of fact from out the night,
Each burst of truth upon my sight
That quickens awe or adds delight,
Reveals my God controlling.

William H. Reid